March 4, 2005
Defining Things
I had an interesting experience this week while sharing with a new
acquaintance. She asked how long I had had M.S. and when I told about 25
years, she asked a very common question, "How have you handled that?"
In the midst of my stock answers, which most of you have heard, I found
myself saying for the first time that "I try never to let MS define me,
but that I strive to define it in my life." New way of saying, "I have
M.S. but M.S. doesn't have me!"
Later I got to thinking about what things I let define me; and what
things do I make the choice, and then the effort to not allow them to
define who I am? Make sense?
We are all quickly defined by sex, age, ethnicity, our role as
husband/wife, father/mother, employer/employee, friend-- and the list goes on.
Some of the things that others might define me by may or may not be
labels I wish to add to that list. Therein lies the dilemma. What am I
in control of, and what things just are? I am a white, American woman,
wife and mother -- can't change any of those and don't want to.
But, how about, Disciple of Jesus, Seeker after God, prayer warrior,
friend, mentor, companion? Those are labels I want to be used to define
me, but how successfully do I encourage, nurture and develop those
attributes? Or, like my sex and age, do I take them for granted and just
foolishly assume they will be the way others define me?
Needless to say, when we begin to think along these lines, those attributes
that we really want to be the definitive things in our lives will only be
so as we allow God to grow them. I must give to them the attention and
nurturance they require to become, or remain, the defining attributes of
my life. I don't have to work at being an American female -- that's what
I was born as; neither did I do anything to become a victim of M.S. -- I just am.
But I have to work at being a Disciple of Christ, a friend, the best wife
and mother possible, and the controller of what role I allow MS (or you can
substitute any of your life's challenges here) to play in my life.
Am I going to allow a handicap, being overweight, shy, lack of self esteem,
financial hardships, marital conflicts, embarrassments or any of the myriad
of other negatives this life can bring my way to be the things that I let
define who I really am? As a Believer, old things have all passed away,
and behold, I have become a new creature in Christ Jesus!
Those negatives of the world need to no longer be the labels I wear! I have
a new Name and His attributes are the ones I want to see grow and become
what defines me! The work is there before us.
What defines you today? what do you want to define you tomorrow?
Please share your thoughts.
Until next time -- love and prayers,
RuthAnn Gleason, the Parson's Wife
ragleason@sbcglobal.net
