Our neighbors have little power over us. They may threaten, malign and gossip about us but we need to have good relations with them. Threats and gossip for cannot hurt us. But we should not spread untruths, gossip or malign our neighbors, even if they hate us. So to keep the second great commandment we need to do more in order for our gifts and offerings are accepted by God.  Jesus tells us we need to have peace and  love in our hearts -- to avoid conflict,  and we need to give our neighbor the same benefits we have ourselves.   What are these benefits and prerogatives? Well we need to give them respect. We cannot insult anyone and expect to be treated ourselves with respect. We cannot steal or cheat another and still expect us to obtain fair dealing from others.   Yes we love our relatives, and some of our friends, and a few neighbors, but we don't treat them as we would want ourselves to be treated. Do we indulge ourselves more than others? Do we make excuses for ourselves? Well then we must allow others to also make excuses for their behavior, and we need to give to others what we would like to obtain ourselves.

In this we need to look at social justice, fairness, honesty, etc. for these are the things we desire from others.   We do not want others to treat us like we are unintelligent, flawed, retarded, disadvantaged, etc. so why should we treat others this way? Or better yet, why should we allow others to be treated this way, without fighting for their rights and privileges too?
 

   Saint Paul tells us that no one is without sin -- that we all fall short of God's expectation for us. If we are in such a miserable condition ourselves when God looks upon us, how much more so of others when they are looked upon? So we need to see ourselves as sinners and unworthy of God's attention. But still since God is loving, forgiving and merciful, then so too is this accorded to others, even if they do not possess the same faith as we. And if we change our outlook on ourselves, then we will also change the outlook we have on others. This is what Jesus wants us to see.   The gift of salvation and the forgiveness of sin is unmerited. We do not receive it because we earned it, or somehow expect it to be given to us. No we obtain it as a free gift from God -- a thing not merited-- but  through the benefits at Christ's substitutionary Sacrifice. Without this we can only expect death and damnation because that is the penalty for sin, -- all sin.   \

God gave His Only Begotten Son, delivered Him over to punishment and death, in our stead. He gave us a substitute for the punishment which was earned for Adam's transgression in the Garden.  From disobedience, then comes obedience, because although Jesus  didn't merit all that was placed on Him, He was horribly beaten, insulted, spat upon, and crucified for us, -- just so we would not have to suffer the same things for our sins.    The difference is that Jesus rose again from the dead, in order to prove to us that what He said is true. He guaranteed that we would have a similar eternal life as a result of His Redemptive Sacrifice if we accepted God's free gift, and if we lived by the example which was given to us in Christ Jesus Our Lord.
 

  Another point to remember for us is that when we pray the Lord's Prayer, it is one of our most treasured gifts from Jesus, how to pray.  But In it we ask God to forgive us our sins AS we forgive the sins of others. So this then is a CONDITIONAL prayer for forgiveness. Many merely repeat the words by memory without thinking what they are actually praying.   We ask God for the same measure of forgiveness we accord others their sins. So if someone does something to us or our relatives, we are obligated to forgive them their sins against us. We do not have to go out of our way to do this. We don't even have to have compassion for them, but we do have to forgive them -- otherwise we are not forgiven, and no matter what we offer to God it is unacceptible to Him if we hold anything against another.   If we begin to change ourselves, to understand ourselves, and to treat ourselves as we should be treated, then it is only natural to offer to others the same thing. If we excuse our own sins and transgressions, how much more so to excuse those of others.