ON MARRIAGE -GOD'S PLAN FOR YOU

Look before you leap: Marrying into another Faith

Look before you leap is good advice, especially the leap called "marriage". God's people believe in careful looking. We have a high regard for marriage: a God-established life-long union of a man and a woman for their mutual welfare and happiness. We have a deep concern that marriages work, and work well. "God has designed marriage so it works best when He is an active partner in it."

One question deserves a long and hare pre-leap look: "Should I enter into a spiritually mixed marriage?" In other words: "Should I as a believer in Jesus Christ and a disciple who accepts His teaching, adopts His lifestyle, and shares in His mission, marry someone who does not?"

Some downplay religious difference in marriage and consider them to be of little importance. They are mistaken. The axiom, "What a person believes determines how he behaves," is especially true in marriage. Belief guides behavior in marriage or in anything else.

As we consider the question of a spiritually mixed marriage, we consider some key Scriptural points to guide us in forming our answer. Let us consider the following four points:

1. God permits mixed marriage, but He does not promote them.

Marriage is a matter of this life only and is not exclusively for Christians. God does not prohibit us from marrying a non-Christian or a person who believes in Christ but holds to false beliefs. A spiritually mixed marriage CAN work. The couple can enjoy God's gifts of loving companionship, sexual happiness, and children. God CAN use such a marriage to help an unbeliever come to faith in the Savior (I Corinthians 7:16, I Peter 3:1-2). I have seen this happen a number of times, and what a joy it is when a person finds a Savior as well as a spouse!

While God permits spiritually mixed marriages, we must also say that He does not promote them. His urging that we marry "in the Lord" (I Corinthians 7:39) is more than good advice. Christians involved in spiritually mixed marriages face some potentially harmful challenges to their spiritual life.

2. A mixed marriage increases the risk of faith damage.

A Christian involved in a spiritually mixed marriage runs a special spiritual risk. It's easy to see why. Spouses can have a great influence on each other for spiritual good, but also for spiritual harm.

All too often a spouse's influence has turned a believer away from Jesus and the Christian faith. God's commands to His Old Testament people not to marry unbelievers or those of a different faith (Deuteronomy 7:3-4) can serve as a warning to us. Is it wise to enter into a relationship that will lead us to be indifferent toward or defect from our Savior, who loves us and gives us more than any spouse ever could?

The tragic spiritual outcome of a man like King Ahab is a pointed reminder that it doesn't profit a person to gain a beautiful, wealthy, powerful, talented, but ungodly spouse and lose his soul. Consider the risk!

3. A mixed marriage lacks the Christ-in-common factor.

A spiritual mixed marriage lacks a vital ingredient - a common faith in Christ and all He teaches.

Cecil Myers once said, "Successful marriage is always a triangle: a man, a woman, and God." God has designed marriage so it works BEST when He is an active partner in it; graciously ruling in the hearts of both husband and wife, enabling them to pattern their relationship after the loving relationship of Christ and the Church (Ephesians 5:22-31), and helping them express Christ-like forgiveness, love, sacrifice, and service toward each other.

God cannot be an active partner in marriage when one spouse rejects Him. That spouse has no desire or ability to have a Christ-centered marriage. In the case of marriage to a Christian who holds to false teachings, the strength of the Christ-in-common factor is impaired.

A 1980 U.S. census report shows how active involvement in God's Word by married couples affected marriage stability. It reports: "Although 1 in 3 marriages ends in divorce, those who have church weddings and attend church REGULARLY beat the odds by 1 in 50. Of couples who marry in the church, attend regularly, AND have family worship, 1 in 1,105 ends in divorce."

Having Christ and His Word in common adds stability and satisfaction to a marriage. This satisfaction flows from the God of perfect love working in and through the other partner of the marriage triangle. When thinking about a spiritually mixed marriage, consider what will be lacking.

4. A mixed marriage makes it difficult to train Christian children.

One of the great challenges of any Christian is to train children to be faithful followers of Jesus. It's not easy. It's difficult when both parents are faithful followers themselves. It magnifies in difficulty when one parent is not a follower of Christ or holds an erroneous form of Christianity. A study conducted several years ago bears this out A church wanted to know how the church attendance of parents affected their children in later life. The discovery:

"If both Dad and Mom attend regularly, 55% remain faithful.

If only Mom attends regularly, 15% remain faithful.

If neither attend regularly, 6% remain faithful."

Children who grow up in homes where the parents are not united in Christian faith can become confused about what should be believed, and in the process, jeopardize their soul's salvation. When contemplating a marriage partner consider the spiritual welfare of your children.

I pray that God blesses you richly in your marital looking, leaping...and especially your landing!

On His Plan for Your Mate

Everyone longs to give themselves completely to someone...to have a deep loving soul relationship with another, to be loved thoroughly and exclusively. But God to a Christian says, "No, not until you are first satisfied and fulfilled and content with being loved by Me alone." I love you my child, and until you discover that only by Me is your satisfaction to be found, you will not be capable of the perfect human relationship that I have planned for you. You will not be united with another until you are united with Me...exclusive of any other desires and longs. I want you to stop planning, stop wishing, and allow Me to give you the most thrilling plan existing...one that you can't imagine. I want you to have the BEST! Please allow Me to bring it to you...just keep watching Me, expecting the greatest things...keep learning and listening to the things I tell you...you must wait and you won't be disappointed.

Don't be anxious. Don't worry. Don't look around at the things others have gotten or what I've given them. Don't look at the things that you think you want. Just keep looking off and away up to Me, or you'll miss what I want to show you.

And, then, when you are ready, I'll surprise you with a love FAR MORE WONDERFUL than any you would have dreamed of. You see, until you are ready, and until the one I have for you is ready,...I am working even at this moment to have both of you ready at the same time...Until you are both satisfied exclusively with Me and the life that I have prepared for you, you won't be able to experience the love that exemplifies your relationship with me. And this is perfect love.

And dear one, I want you to have this most wonderful love. I want you to see in the flesh a picture of your relationship with Me, and enjoy materially and completely the everlasting union of beauty and perfection and love that I offer you with Myself. Know that I love you utterly. I am God Almighty, the Lord Jesus who lived and died for you. Believe and be satisfied.

THE TEN COMMANDMENTS...WHAT DO THEY MEAN?

Exodus 20

1.  Thou shalt have no other gods before Me.

Do you fear, love and trust anyone or anything more than God?  Do you give thanks in all things?  Do you place God or pleasure first?  Do you trust and believe in Him from the heart?

 2.  Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain, for the Lord will not hold him guiltless that takes His name in vain.

Do you wish bad against anyone who has wronged you?  Do you swear, listen to songs or watch movies with profanity?  Do you shun falsehoods found with astrologers, tarot cards, horoscopes, and the lottery?

3.  Remember the Sabbath Day and keep it holy.

Do you think lightly of God's Word and His Sacraments?  Do you speak unkindly about church, The Bible, and God?  Do you permit sleep to interfere with your attendance at worship?  Do you set aside time for coming together to hear and to work with the Word of God and to praise God by song and prayer?

4.  Honor thy father and thy mother that thy days may be long upon the land which the Lord thy God gives thee.

Have you despised or been disrespectful towards your parents?  Have you purposely said things to anger parents, neighbors or employers?  Have you in any way been disrespectful to your parents or those in authority?

5.  Thou shalt not kill.

Do you secretly or openly hate someone?    Do you curse those who have done wrong to you?  Do you quarrel, nag or tease others?  Are you guilty of doing anything in excess?  Do you do all you can to help those less fortunate?  Many of the people among whom we must live do us harm, so that we are given cause for being at enmity with them, but God has delegated His authority to punish evildoers to the civil government.

6.  Thou shalt not commit adultery.

Do you indulge in immoral thoughts and lustful desires?  Do you delight in hearing or telling obscene jokes?  Have you committed an unclean act alone or with another?  Your heart, your mouth, your whole body are to be chaste, modest and pure.  They are to allow no room, give no assitance, and offer no encouragement to unchastity.

7.  Thou shalt not steal.

Have you schemed or plotted to gain another's possessions?  Have you misrepresented goods in buying or selling or taken advantage of someone?  Have you contributed regularly and generously to your church or do you rob God? Remember God sees everything.  He will not let you suffer any lack or want, but enjoy a hundred times more than you could scrape together by irresponsible conduct and unjust dealings.

8.  Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor.

Are you holding any grudges?  Is there anyone to whom you are not speaking?  Have you listened to or spread gossip?  In order to avoid such habitual sinning with the tongue, we should not publicly reprove or judge our neighbor unless he has specifically given us this authority.  I may see and hear my neighbor sinning, but I have no business reporting it all around town, let your ear become its grave.

9.  Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's house.

Are you jealous or envious of others?  Do you continually complain and grumble?  Have you deceived another of his property or possessions?  No one under any pretext has the right to scheme to deprive his neighbor of what belongs to him.

10.  Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his cattle, nor anything that is thy neighbor's.

Are you bored with family or friends?  Have you urged anyone to be careless or unfaithful?  Have you tried to coax others from your neighbor to yourself?  To make a profit (at the expense of someone in trouble or in debt) by pressuring the victim until he sells is not fair business dealing especially when looking at whether you would want others to do such a thing to you.

WHY BAD THINGS HAPPEN

Grace, unending and undeserved love.

For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. - Ephesians 6:12

Life is full of trials and tribulations (not punishment) because Christ suffered that.  There are numerous reasons for them.

•   a test of our faith,
•   an opportunity for others to serve,
•   an opportunity to witness (not convert for only God does that through the Holy Spirit),
•   a consequence for sin,
•   to turn us away from wrong (make things difficult for us and get back on track),
•   to call upon Me in the day of trouble.

DEPEND ON GOD 

We need to study and search His Holy Word all our lives.  This is the importance of Sunday and every day of our lives.

Where should we place our trust?  Some place all their trust in their ability to provide themselves with food, pleasure, all needs, even their own good health.  We are to set our trust upon the Lord for all of this, on the Lord alone!  We can center our trust so strongly upon ourselves that we become conceited, filled with selfish pride and have no desire to do good for, or love others.  Beware, follow the direction of the Holy Spirit as we are warned.

Our Lord comes right to the point.  Either He is the master of our trust, love, and hope or it is another.  If it is another, it shows itself in a weak faith.  His Word lists for us what is to be our number one priority.

Hebrews is a guideline for living the faith.

Faith, Scripture and Grace saves.  Believe, endure, be faithful.  Hope in eternal life for He sustains all who believe.

On Promise and Living:  God shows He keeps His promise in the Old Testament.  The New Testament has Epistles or letters on how to live life also.

The four Gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke and John) are about the Life of Christ.